Facebook

I, along with the rest of my family, have become a facebook junky. It is great fun and a fantastic way to reconnect with old friends, make new friends, support one another...and PLAY. Well, I have totally neglected my 'blogging' because I have been too busy visiting and farming on facebook. (If you want to know about farming, just check out facebook.com . It is fun, but I hear there are a lot of other really fun games too, such as Vampire Wars and Fashion Wars, to name a few.) Sadly, I could not log on to the facebook site at this time, due to 'maintenance' issues or something like that. The good news is, HERE I AM AGAIN! Yeh!

On the second, I started a post entitled, 'Glynna's Health Log 2009'. I did not finish it and ended up deleting it, since it was old news, so I will give it a shot again. I thought if I am accountable to 'the internet world', maybe I will stick to my goals better. :)I am weighing in every Monday morning at the gym. My goal is 135 pounds. My highest weight was 225 pounds back in the early spring of 2005. My size 20 jeans were too tight for me so I was wearing elastic pants or sweats because I refused to purchase a size 22. I decided it was time to do something about this. I was uncomfortable and depressed all the time. I could not sleep very well because my hips and back hurt so I tossed and turned all night. I started walking with a friend/neighbor of mine in Fernley, NV. By May, I had lost 10 pounds and was down to 215 pounds. I could fit into my size 20 jeans again and I was just elated. I loved exercise again, but food (namely, chocolate and pastries) was a great challenge for me to control. So, I decided to join Weight Watchers. One year later, in June, 2006, I became a lifetime member of Weight Watchers and have been an advocate for the program ever since. Attending meetings faithfully was key for me. I loved the support and the valuable information taught each week, and, of course, I needed the accountability. All of the people who work for Weight Watchers 'have been there and done that' so they are terrific supporters. They totally understand how hard it is to lose weight and keep it off. I even worked for WW for a few months. My ultimate goal is 135 pounds, but I set my Weight Watchers goal at 155 to become a lifetime member faster. I got my weight down to 147 pounds over the summer of 2006, I was a size 10, felt fabulous, and was sleeping through the night without a problem at all.

Anyway, about a year ago, or so, I started putting a little bit of weight back on. I have gained 20 pounds back. I weigh 167 pounds as of yesterday's weigh in. And, I know EXACTLY why. It is because I STOPPED ATTENDING WW MEETINGS EVERY SINGLE WEEK. For the past two weeks I have been back on track. I am exercising regularly and keeping track of what I am eating. I was a little frustrated that I did so well last week and did not lose one pound, but I know from past experience that if I persevere - and I will - that the weight will come off. This time I will not quit at 147 pounds (if my 40 year old body will allow it) and I will reach my real goal of 135 pounds.

Well, that is it for now...I've got to go see if I can get back on Facebook before the Daycare kids wake up from their naps...hee hee.

I hope you are all having a fabulous start to your new year! I certainly am. I know Chad is out of work right now and I only have two full-time daycare kids, but I have really enjoyed having Chad around. He and I are great friends. We really enjoy one another's company...and isn't that just how it should be in a marriage. I am very happy and very grateful. I love you honey!

Cancer Part 2 - Biopsy

(NOTE: As this is the 10 year anniversary of my diagnosis with, and treatment of Osteosarcoma, I thought I would recount my memories of the significant moments in that year. Read part 1 here.)

The date was August 6th 1998, coincidentally, and fortunately, 3 years to the very day that I started to work for Autoliv in Brigham City Utah. Fortuntately because after 3 years of service I was eligible for full short term disability, 80% of my salary, vs. just 40% is I went on disability any earlier. One of many blessings and miracles, if you choose to see it that way, that we experienced through this entire ordeal.

We had been referred to a neurosurgeon to consult on what to do about my tumor, discovered in the MRI I had in July. We were sent to a neurosurgeon because the MRI revealed that the tumor encased the nerve roots at C7, C8, T1, and T2 and partially at C6. By the way, this link gives a pretty darn good approximation of what they did when they fused my spine in February of 1999.

These are designations for vertebrae, particularly in the cervical spine (neck) and the thoracic spine (upper back). C6, C7, and C8 are the lower-most vertebrae in the cervical spine and the very next is T1, the top-most vertebra in the thoracic spine.

The nerves that come out of these vertebrae make up what is called the brachial plexus, a junction of the nerves that come out of the spine at the lower neck and upper back and go into your shoulder and arm. Most all of the nerves that control the arm come through the brachial plexus. My tumor was smack-dab in the middle of the brachial plexus and all of the nerves there went right through the tumor. Since the danger to damage these nerves was very great, a neurosurgeon was necessary to ensure that at little damage as possible was done.

August 6th we went in for the first of what would be several surgeries over the years. The plan was to go in above the colar bone and simply pull the tumor out. It was assumed that the tumor at this point was benign and that would likely mean it was like a balloon and could just be pulled out through a relatively small incision. Here is the scar this and subsequent surgeries left behind (luckily kind of hard to see, but more visible in real life).

I was nervous more than I thought I would be for this surgery. We just did not know what this would all mean to us, and the threat of cancer loomed, even though the doctor was reasonably confident it was not cancerous. Cancerous tumors in this part of the body were just too rare. The odds were against it being cancer. Still, I wondered.

The surgery lasted about 5 hours, pretty short compared to others I have had. In the end, the tumor was not like a balloon, it was more like a mass of peanut butter. It stuck to everything. The doctor did all he could to "debulk" the tumor to at least give me some relief of the pain that started all this off, and he took material for a biopsy. It turns out that "sticky" tumors indicate they are encroaching on surrounding tissue, meaning they are spreading aggressively, which is a prime indicator of cancer.

One interesting side effect of this surgery is that they cut nerves that control some of the autonomous functions on the left side of my head. My left eye droops just a little now, and I don't sweat on the left side of my head. It is literally like a line. When I work out or play basketball or whatever you can actually see a line on my forehead, sweat beads visible on the right side, dry as a bone on the left. This also means I overheat very easily since I do not sweat enough to cool my head down. I guess I have truly become a hot-head through all this!

I also am largely numb across the upper left part of my chest. This started with this surgery and got worse with other surgeries. Also, no hair grows there. Weird. The little things you just don't think about in situations like this. Really adds new meaning to "the devil is in the details".

I recovered just fine from the surgery. One rather funny memory is when I was in the hospital (I was there for about 3 or 4 days I think), and I was on pain meds. They had be hooked up to a machine that would dole out a specific dose of morphine when I pushed a button, then would not give me any more for a certain amount of time, then would give me another dose and so on. My sisters came to visit right after I had pushed that little button and I was somewhat loopy. I had a big grin on my face and they asked me if I was alright. I responded with "Now I know why they call it MORE-phine...cuz you just want more."

You take what laughs you can get, right?

I need to look up the exact date, but it was nearly a month later that we met again with the neurosurgeon. They had sent out the tumor material for testing and the results were grim. Glynna and I both sat in his office after he gave me a once-over to see how I was healing. He then sat down and told us that they tests had come back positive. The tumor was malignant.

Osteosarcoma, he said. Bone cancer.

We were both kind of in shock at that point. What do you say about that? The tears did not really come in force until we got home. I was scared, but I really had no idea how bad it would get. We were then referred to Dr. Alton Wagnon, my first oncologist.

I remember telling my dad. He was supportive and understanding and just awesome about the whole thing. My dad is just that way, one of the best people you could ever hope to know.

The news came as a pretty big shock for my whole family. My paternal grandmother had died of cancer when I was about 7. I could vaguely remember that. My brother-in-law, Art, had died of cancer while I was on my mission, a mere 7 years before, to the very month I received my diagnosis. I could not imagine how hard that was for my sister to relive some of that horrible time through me.

Uncertainty is a terrible feeling, and up to that point I really did not understand the phrase "all we have to fear is fear itself". Our lives changed dramatically on that day, in some ways for the better, and in other ways for the worse.

I turned 28 in 1998. And I graduated from college. My kids were 5, 3, and 1. I had been married for 6 years. And I had cancer.

Happy New Year 2009

Here I sit at one o'clock in the afternoon, barely out of bed, hair a mess, third rice krispy treat in hand, last night's make-up all over my face...(lovely image isn't it?), READY TO START MY NEW YEAR RIGHT...Hey, I did get dressed.

Not only am I blowing that 'fresh new start', but I am admitting it to the world...hang on a sec...I am having a muddy buddy attack...What kind of nut job am I?! Don't answer that.

Ok, ok, I admit it. I am not as witty as my husband or children, but at least I try. Hey! I have done two good things this fine new year! I got dressed and I tried to be witty. Whoo hoo!

We had a great Mormon celebration last night. Instead of waking up with hang-overs, we wake up with puzzle gut (as my mother-in-law calls it). Ya, we like to claim we are not addicts...and then someone shows up with a BIG bowl of muddy buddies...and someone else shows up with a mountain high tray of donuts...then someone else shows up with a lovely package of chocolates just screaming out my name...I mean your name...he he...Before you know it, it is 3am and you wish you could barf...Gee, that sure sounds a little teensy bit like a non-mormon celebration...he he...

Anyway, we did have a great party. I took lots of pictures, as usual, and irritated alot of people, as usual...hee hee. Hey, everyone just has to deal with the fact that I like memories. We had 16 people eating, playing a Wii bowling tournament, chatting, texting, eating some more, laughing, cleaning (Mom), and eating some more, etc. etc....It was great fun.

I told my family I would make crepes for breakfast on New Year's Day...no matter what time of day it was...but the only response I got when I mentioned making more sweet food was "Uuuuuhhgggghhhh". I took that as a "Please! No! Just shoot me before you put more sugar in my body!". Needless to say, we ate eggs instead.

I am officially part of facebook now so any of you out there who want to be my friend are invited...so far I have two friends...Angie and Kelly. I NEED FRIENDS!!! What I really need is to know how to create my own farm...That looked so fun.

Happy New Year 2009! Best wishes and lots of love to you all!